In His Clothes

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Teddies, Thongs, Garters; I own them all. The purpose of these silky treasures is, of course, to entice my husband. When I want his eyes to light up, I combine thong and skirt. When I want his heart to race, I use the garters. And when I want his jaw to practically fall off, I create a complete ensemble including thong, garters, stockings, and teddie...But this is all to make him want me...

When I'm feeling naughty and want to turn myself on, I use another technique. I do something that makes me feel sensual, sultry, down right edible...I wear my husband's shirts.

For me, nothing compares to the wickedly delicious sensation of surrounding my freshly showered skin in his unmistakably masculine scent. I love the way his cologne clings to the collars, and how small I seem in comparison. I'll press my face into the material, breath deeply, and imagine its his fingertips caressing my nipples as the shirt moves. Sometimes I slip into a thong, other times I prefer to remain naked underneath, not wanting anything to come between us.

His shirt keeps him with me when he's at work, comforts and protects me, makes me think of him with every step I take. I may cook dinner, or watch tv, but his shirt is a constant source of distraction. I can't help my wayward thoughts as they drift from one memory to the next. I think of the way he fucked me in it last time, or that it's missing a button from the time before that. As I run my hands down the front, pressing the cotton to my breasts, down my stomach, I find my fingers drift easily between my thighs...And I am wet.

Sometimes I can't help it, and begin to tease myself, relaxing into a chair or the sofa. I sink easily into a favorite fantasy...He's my captor, I'm tied up...Or I make up new ones as I go. Regardless of the story, the ending is always the same. I stop before cumming. After all, the point is to be ready when he gets home.

So depending on how much time I have, these little excite-and-stop sessions may go on for hours, an entire afternoon. An utter indulgence, I know. Certainly not something I can do everyday...But on those rare occasions when I can, in those stolen moments when nothing else matters but the knowledge that very soon my husband will walk through the door, see me naked and wet in his shirt, and devour me as though his very life depended on it...I don't waste time hesitating.

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The Myth of Two Orgasms

Photo Kindly Provided By: A. Kaye Photo - The Art of Women

"Do Women Really Have Two Different Kinds of Orgasms?"

I recently came across this question posted in a sex forum that I frequent and thought it was a topic that could certainly use some clarification!

There is only one kind of orgasm. The only difference is how an orgasm is triggered. For most women (roughly 70%) orgasm can only be achieved via clitoral stimulation. A much smaller group can have an orgasm via penetration (often referred to as a vaginal orgasm), and a very small group can reach orgasm either way. Then again, some women have orgasms with nipple stimulation alone, or can be "trained" to have an orgasm on command...but this is getting very involved and complicated!

No matter how orgasm is achieved, however, the reaction in the body is the same; increased circulation, respiration, flushing, increased muscular tension, and finally a series of intense vaginal and uterine contractions. The subjective experience of orgasm does differ depending on how it is triggered, varying in intensity, duration, and so forth. These differences in "feeling" have helped to perpetuate the myth of "different kinds" of orgasms.

Historically women were told that the only "real" orgasm was a vaginal one achieved by penetration alone, and that an orgasm brought about by clitoral stimulation was somehow "immature." Yes, we have Freud to thank for this huge misconception. His idea left the vast majority of women thinking there was something wrong with them because they couldn't orgasm just by having penetrative sex with their partners!

Thank goodness the feminists came along, with the help of Masters and Johnson, and set the record straight!

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Sex Swing - Illustrated Erotica

Katie knew that Pete had bought her something big for her birthday but she hadn't expected… this.

"There, baby, what do you think?" he'd said, smiling slyly. "More interesting than flowers, wouldn't you say?"

She'd opened her eyes to discover he'd installed a sex swing in the corner of their back room. The black harness was fixed firmly to the ceiling by a hook and hung on a spring above a mattress. The back support and stirrups were made of a soft, inviting fabric.

After the initial shock, Katie began to think of the possibilities. Her pussy clenched in response. She'd always liked the idea of a sex swing. They seemed like the ultimate decadence, something owned by people who threw orgies and fucked each other three times a day. People who were passionate enough about sex to install major equipment and put holes in their ceiling.

And she liked the idea of getting away from the bedroom too. Their back room was private and rarely used. Now it looked like some kind of nascent dungeon, an adult play area, in theory at least. She liked the idea that they might fuck each other here, in broad daylight, like porn stars or urgent, illicit lovers, giving themselves over to simple lust without any other consideration.

Best of all, she liked the idea of being held, suspended, spread open and ready for licking and fucking, unable to escape.

She found herself incredibly turned on.

Katie turned to Pete and gave him a long, lingering...(Read More)

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Can Someone Really Love You AND Hit You?

Photo Kindly Provided By: A. Kaye Photo - The Art of Women

Nelli, one of my favorite fellow bloggers, wrote a post today asking exactly this question. Because I enjoyed her post so very much, I left a rather lengthy comment and thought I'd share it with you. Below is the comment, but be sure to check out the original post here.

What Do You Think?!

"Hi Nelli, I agree this is a great topic and one that is very emotionally heated. Do I think you can hit someone you love? YES. Do I think that justifies it or justifies staying in such a relationship? NO.

At the core, we are animals. As much as we try to hide it, deny it, cover it up with fluffy moral chatter, we are designed to react violently to certain situation. I know this is a very unpopular view, but I do think that you can truly love someone, and given the right situation, hurt them physically.

You mentioned cheating as an example. Catching your beloved with someone else, or learning about it afterward, can trigger very deeply held emotions that are not governed by our pre-frontal cortex, the logical, thinking part of our brain. Essentially, the rational part of our brain can be over ridden by other parts - such as the limbic system which largely governs our emotional reactions, potentially leading to violence. Hence the "temporary insanity" plea (which I agree is very over used!).

However, knowing and understanding this does not justify staying in an abusive relationship because there are a lot of people who do have a great ability to "control" themselves. No one should stay with a partner who has hit them in the past. If they've already demonstrated an inability to inhibit their violent reactions once, they will undoubtedly do it again under high emotional stress.

But just because someone hits you, does not necessarily mean they do not "really" love you.

For the record - Sex and violence have a very strong connection to each other in almost all species of animals that use sex as a means of reproduction. Of course sex between people can be wonderfully soft, gentle, and romantic...But sex does have a much rougher side that can't and shouldn't be ignored. Although rape is certainly something that should be punished, there is some truth behind the idea that men are just sexually aggressive. Not to mention that most women have fantasies about being dominated to varying degrees...even being raped. Again I am not condoning rape in any way, but I want to point out that sexual power dynamics are always present and are often very arousing."

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Un-Saintly Sexy Mamas

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I have found a place on the internet where real women, who happen to be mothers as well, meet to talk about relationships and sex. At CafeMom not only do they chat about the normal "Oh, now that I'm a Mom I don't feel like having sex anymore" problems, but they also open up about every aspect of their sex lives. Message board topics include "Multiple Orgasms," "How Often Does Your Husband Masturbate?" and "Anyone Else Bi-Curious?" The discussions are graphic, uncensored, and brutally honest. I was very impressed by the thoughtfulness, open-mindedness, and supportive attitudes of these women.

I was also pleasantly surprised to find that their were quite a few Groups dedicated to sexuality. Each group has hundreds to thousands of members and have very active communities. For instance, I posted an introduction and within twenty minutes had three replies. These women are lively, and certainly not shy!

As you may know from my previous posts, I don't like or agree with the stereotype of the "Virginal Mother" who is often pitted against the other cultural archetype, the "Whore." As a woman if you are "too" sexual, you can't be a good mother, and conversely as a mother you are expected to be ultra-conservative and hush-hush about sex. Thank goodness for places like CafeMom!

So, if you are a mother and refuse to relinquish your wonderfully sexual side, take a look at CafeMom, or go directly to one of the groups that I'm talking about by clicking a banner below. I promise that at the least you'll be entertained, and will probably learn something here and there.

Grown & Sexy Seriously Sexual Chat

Sexy Mamas!

More than 69

PS - There are also lots of other Groups that chat about other Motherly things...It's not all about sex!

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Finally, a "YouTube" for Porn!

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Go ahead, admit it. You've gone to YouTube and searched for "adult," "sex," "XXX," or "porn." Don't lie! You know you have...

I'm sure you thought, "Surely somebody out there has uploaded themselves getting crazy on a Friday night!" But inevitably the disappointment sank in because even the videos marked for "content" are nothing more than PG-13 shots...The wonderful YouTube Cleanliness Committee has already searched for and destroyed any of the "really good videos."

But cheer up, 'cause I have quite a treat for you this lucky Sunday! I've found it, the hidden porn treasure trove. A YouTube-like site just for adults...and it's completely free.

No more 10 second clips, no more wasted time searching out adult content on non-adult sites...

Now you can go to GEXO and see all the happy bopping you want!

Apparently the site launched this January, so is still in the process of working out its "kinks" so to speak. As I mentioned, it is free now, but I'm not sure if a site this good will remain that way for long.

If you're feeling a little, um, erotically charged, go ahead and visit. I was so excited by this discovery I just had to share the Love with you, my most appreciated readers!

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When Was The Last Time You Got A Hickey?

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I was watching a BBC show the other night and somehow the topic of hickeys came up. One man, probably in his forties, said "Yeah, I remember what a big deal hickeys were as a teenager...But adults don't give hickeys do they? I suppose it would be weird as an adult."

When I heard this I was a bit taken aback, mainly because I'd never thought of it before. (A sex topic I hadn't thought about?! Really?!) So of course, I began to wonder...How do adults feel about giving and receiving hickeys? First of all, let's be clear about what a hickey, otherwise known as a "love bite," is. According to the all-knowing and all-powerful Wikipedia, a hickey is a "temporary mark or bruise on one's skin resulting from kissing or sucking or biting forcefully enough to burst blood vessels beneath the skin." Mmmmm, sounds sexy doesn't it? A bruise!

This is perhaps the only kind of bruise that lovers routinely inflict upon each other without sending up the little red warning flags of abuse. (Yes I realize bruising can also be a side effect of many rougher types of mutually pleasurable sex play such as spanking...but let's stick to hickeys for now, shall we?)

So the ideas behind this man's statement were:

1) Teenage lovers give and get hickeys all the time
2) Adults do not give or get hickeys
3) Adults that do give or get hickeys are "weird"

Breaking this down, we can ask the question "why" to each of his assumptions.

Number One, why do teenagers give and get so many hickeys? My guess is that hickeys are a result of great sexual passion having no where else to go. Because teenagers are generally discouraged from actually going through with sex, all that kissing and petting builds an enormous amount of sexual passion. Since that passion can't be channeled into the normally energetic and vigorous thrusting sexual gyrations, it's released via the strong and intimate act of sucking and biting on each other's skin in an overly zealous manner...Hence the bruising. Does that make sense to you? It does in my head.

Number Two, why don't we see more adults walking around with red, black, and blue marks on various parts of their anatomies? Again, the answer could be exactly the same as discussed above. Because adults usually do go "all the way," as sexual tension grows to the point of wanting to tear each other to pieces, penetration of some kind usually ensues...channeling those crazy desires into the intensity of the sex act itself. So, instead of biting and sucking each other to death, we f*ck each other instead...And f*cking doesn't leave behind any tell-tale hickeys for the world to see. (Adults are deceptive little creatures, aren't they?)

And finally, Number Three, why are hickey toting adults weird? The answer to this goes a little beyond the previous two. The logic might go, as an adult you can have sex, so why the need for hickeys? Or maybe, as an adult you should "know" better than to leave an inappropriate mark! After all, what will your boss think come Monday morning? A big sign on your neck that says "I had a lot of sex this weekend and I may be a crazy-sex-freak" is certainly not good PR for your firm. And lastly, adults who have hickeys might seem irresponsible and immature simply because a hickey will associate with adolescence in the minds of many adult onlookers. So, I can see where Mr. BBC Man was coming from.

On the other hand...

I don't think an adult who gives or gets hickeys should be considered "weird" at all! I think a hickey symbolizes passion-play between lovers, and can actually be a sign of a great adult sexual relationship. After all, for many adults the intense build-up to sex fades with time until sex becomes a routine set of behaviors that may not even be remotely "passionate."

If you still want to have sex with your long-time partner so much that you feel the need to consume them all at once, and that need manifests itself into a highly pleasurable round of erogenous-zone neck/shoulder sucking resulting in a few unfortunately placed hickeys, then good for you!

Plus, placing your sexual "mark" on a partner can be extremely satisfying. It must be a throwback to our most primitive cave-man style decelerations of ownership-love. A hickey screams to the world "Yes I am having sex with this person and No you can not touch them or I will beat you to death." In a way, this symbol goes straight past our logical cultured thoughts to our emotions. If you want to tell a sexual rival to "back-off" I think a hickey will work much better than wedding ring in most circumstances!

In conclusion: Adults, Enjoy your Hickeys!

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Easter Bunnies were Great When I was a Kid...

But Now They're Even Better!!

Or These Bunnies!

Rabbit Massager


Impulse Jack Rabbit

It's good to be an adult! Happy Easter!

Is Beautiful Agony Pornography?

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Beautiful Agony is one of the hottest and most talked about erotic sites on the web. Claiming to be "dedicated to the beauty of human orgasm," this site posts videos of people who've filmed themselves masturbating to orgasm. So, what's the big deal? All videos are from the neck up only! That's right - no nudity, no explicit shots, no partner sex - just a face, some moans, and your imagination.

Judging by its continually increasing popularity, people not only find watching orgasmic faces interesting, but highly erotic. In fact man commentors claim that Beautiful Agony is the most sexually exciting thing they've ever seen, especially in comparison to other "traditional" porn sites.

So, while I have no doubt that watching someone else cum makes you want to do the same, can we really classify Beautiful Agony as pornography? After all, it's only showing faces! What's so "indecent" about a face making all sorts of "interesting" expressions, and "funny" noises?

Maybe defining "pornography" would help. According to Merriam-Webster Online pornography is:

1 : the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement
2 : material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement

Hmmm, it does cause sexual excitement, and it does intend to do so. How do I know its intentions? Because the "About" section of Beautiful Agony specifically says - "This may be the most erotic thing you have ever seen, yet the only nudity it contains is from the neck up. That's where people are truly naked." So clearly the website knows that people are watching their material to become "sexually excited."

I suppose then that based on Merriam-Webster it is pornography. Wow. Just watching a face is pornographic. I never thought I'd hear that.

Still, I don't completely buy it. I can't bring myself to call it pornography. Of course it's extremely hot, but so are some billboards! Do they intend to cause sexual excitement? Yes! That's how they get people to purchase their products...But these types of ads aren't pornographic, just sexy. So for me, Beautiful Agony remains in that wickedly naughty area of amazingly-erotic but non-pornographic material.

After all, I can watch "regular" porn all day without even batting an eye, but Beautiful Agony makes *me* blush! Now that's saying something!

What do you think? Is it porn?! See for yourself. Then leave a comment and let me know!

Tricky, Tricky Cowper's Gland!

Back in Sex School, my anatomy professor's favorite body part was the little known Cowper's Gland located just off of the male urethra. I know it was his favorite because he told us so countless times. Why was it his favorite? "Because this is the little bugger that gets soooo many people into trouble!"

That's right, it's because of this teeny gland (actually it's two teeny glands) that the "withdrawal" method of contraception has such a high failure rate! You did know that the withdrawal method is NOT very effective against pregnancy, right?! Right?! Well if you didn't know before, you know now. Pulling the penis out of the vagina just before male ejaculation is NOT A GOOD WAY TO PREVENT PREGNANCY (and obviously does not prevent sexually transmitted infections either!) Here's the reason why.

Let's return to the Cowper's Gland. If you start at the head of the penis and work your way up the inside of the urethra, you'll quickly find the Cowper's Gland. Its reproductive function is to provide pre-ejaculate or "pre-cum" as it's better known...those first few drops that appear at the tip of the penis during arousal. This fluid's main job is not to give your partner something to lick before penetration (though many guys may try to convince you otherwise). Its actual job is to neutralize any acid left over within the urethra by the passage of urine. Since urine is acidic and acid kills sperm, its best to flush out the urethra with something sperm-friendly before the mighty army marches on down to the promised land. (By the way, if those sperm are heading into a vagina, roughly 1/3 of them will be killed instantly by the vagina's own acids anyway!)

So, lucky for those sperm, the Cowper's Gland at least gives them a fighting chance before they leave the penis! Now for the tricky part.

The Cowper's Gland does not produce sperm at all (that's the testes role), nor does it purposefully store sperm (that's the epididymis)...BUT sperm does get trapped in the Cowper's Gland on its way out of the urethra during ejaculation! What does this mean to you?

It means that your morning masturbation session has accidentally left behind some live sperm in your Cowper's gland, and when you have your after-dinner sex tonight those left-behind sperm will inconveniently pop out along with your pre-cum. If your penis happens to be in a vagina without a condom on it at this time, those sperm could potentially impregnate your parter regardless of whether you ejaculate or not! (Although the odds of those few sperm getting all the way up to a fallopian tube alive seems rather small...we all know it DOES happen!!)

There you have it. Now when someone says "Oh we won't get pregnant, he always pulls out before he cums" you can sound like a smarty-pants and explain all about the Cowper's Gland and why that method of contraception fails so often!

Girl-on-Girl Porn - Guys, I need Your Help!

Continuing with the theme of strange hetero-male obsessions, I'd like to talk a little about your fascination with lesbian porn. I've been thinking about this for a while now, and I still can't figure out the answer to...why?? What is the incredible appeal of watching two women go at it without even the hint of a male presence? After all, as fas as I know man-on-man porn is not such a big thing for hetero-women...So, what's with the lesbians?

Here's what I've come up with so far:

1. Women are beautiful and turn you on, therefore seeing two is even better than seeing one. OK, I can understand that.

2. Girl-on-Girl Porn doesn't make you at all jealous because there's no man involved for you to consciously or unconsciously compete with. I suppose watching another man have sex with a "hot" girl might not do it for you because the thought "Why is she doing him and not me?" might be distracting. Right.

3. Seeing his "bigger and better" penis makes you feel self-conscious. If this is your reason be sure to read this. It might help.

4. You think of yourself as so "ultra-heterosexual" that even the thought of another man having sex turns you off - let alone watching it! Yeah, this reasons makes me laugh since watching lesbians is watching homosexuals. Grant it it's not male homosexuals, but still! Plus, wouldn't you rather watch a girl who you could potentially have a chance with by the simple virtue of having a penis than a girl who likes vaginas? (I know, many of the so-called porn lesbians aren't necessarily lesbians off camera, but it's the idea!)

5. I have no fifth reason! I told you this topic stumps me!

None of the previous four reasons seem good enough to explain the prevalence of the lesbian porn mystique. Sure they may be part of the answer, but I'm missing something vitally intrinsic to the overall appeal.

So Guys, I need your help! Leave a comment or write to me at SpeakSexy@aol.com and tell me why YOU enjoy watching two girls kiss, suck, and lick each other. I honestly want to know!

I'm planning to write a follow-up article to this one with all of your fantastic reasons (not your names of course), so please write to me!

P.S. - I hope you enjoyed the videos...Happy Sunday!