5 Reasons Why Masturbation is Good for Mothers

I have to start by thanking Kristofer for pointing out that May has been declared National Masturbation Month since 1995 by the wonderful people over at Good Vibrations. How this has slipped by me is anyone's guess, so I'm giving you, my dear reader, my not-so-sincerest apologies for having missed this monumental event in the past.

That being said, this weekend is also Mother's Day, and I think it would be fun to celebrate both events at once. Here goes.

Apparently Masturbation Month was declared as a way of raising awareness about masturbation and taking away the taboos that surrounded this incredibly common, though rarely discussed, practice. Twelve years later, I think masturbation has finally secured its place as an accepted and rather mundane part of almost everyone's life - except perhaps the very conservatively religious among us. Even Christians are finding ways to reconcile their beliefs with masturbation. Because of this, Masturbation Month seems to have transformed into a purely uninhibited celebration of auto-erotic activity. Now, now, calm yourself! I can see the crazy gleam of excitement dancing in your, er, eyes.

And because you guys are a particularly clever lot of blog readers, I'm sure you've already heard about the health benefits of masturbation so I won't bore you with that stuff here. I do, however, want to point out why masturbation is particularly good for wives and mothers, though I realize many mothers are not wives! So without further ado...

Reasons Why Mothers Should Masturbate:

1. Stress Reduction! Yes, masturbation really does relax you, and mothers are some of the most stressed-out people I know! A more relaxed Mom will make the whole family happier. How does that old saying go? "When Mom's not happy, nobody's happy!"
   
2. More Fun For Dad! It seems the more women masturbate, the more open they are to their partner's sexual advances. At first this seems odd. If she's taking care of her "needs" by herself, wouldn't she want less sex? Turns out the answer is no. Now whether that's because masturbating makes women hornier, or horny women masturbate more is for you to decide. Also, women like to have multiple orgasms...Maybe the first one she gives herself is like an appetizer, gearing her up for more action with her man.
   
3. It Promotes Sleep! Mothers are notorious for being in bad moods due to lack of sleep, especially new Moms who wake up frequently to nurse or give bottles during the night. Masturbating at bed time is a perfect way to help your body wind-down from a busy day.
4. Strengthens the Pelvic Floor! Do your Kegels, do your kegels! It's like a mother's mantra during and after pregnancy. Luckily, orgasms are another great way to tone up those inner muscles. This may be one of the only honestly fun kinds of exercise that exists.
5. Did I Already Say Stress Reduction?

Happy Masturbation-Mother's Day Month!!

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The Myth of Two Orgasms

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"Do Women Really Have Two Different Kinds of Orgasms?"

I recently came across this question posted in a sex forum that I frequent and thought it was a topic that could certainly use some clarification!

There is only one kind of orgasm. The only difference is how an orgasm is triggered. For most women (roughly 70%) orgasm can only be achieved via clitoral stimulation. A much smaller group can have an orgasm via penetration (often referred to as a vaginal orgasm), and a very small group can reach orgasm either way. Then again, some women have orgasms with nipple stimulation alone, or can be "trained" to have an orgasm on command...but this is getting very involved and complicated!

No matter how orgasm is achieved, however, the reaction in the body is the same; increased circulation, respiration, flushing, increased muscular tension, and finally a series of intense vaginal and uterine contractions. The subjective experience of orgasm does differ depending on how it is triggered, varying in intensity, duration, and so forth. These differences in "feeling" have helped to perpetuate the myth of "different kinds" of orgasms.

Historically women were told that the only "real" orgasm was a vaginal one achieved by penetration alone, and that an orgasm brought about by clitoral stimulation was somehow "immature." Yes, we have Freud to thank for this huge misconception. His idea left the vast majority of women thinking there was something wrong with them because they couldn't orgasm just by having penetrative sex with their partners!

Thank goodness the feminists came along, with the help of Masters and Johnson, and set the record straight!

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Is Beautiful Agony Pornography?

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Beautiful Agony is one of the hottest and most talked about erotic sites on the web. Claiming to be "dedicated to the beauty of human orgasm," this site posts videos of people who've filmed themselves masturbating to orgasm. So, what's the big deal? All videos are from the neck up only! That's right - no nudity, no explicit shots, no partner sex - just a face, some moans, and your imagination.

Judging by its continually increasing popularity, people not only find watching orgasmic faces interesting, but highly erotic. In fact man commentors claim that Beautiful Agony is the most sexually exciting thing they've ever seen, especially in comparison to other "traditional" porn sites.

So, while I have no doubt that watching someone else cum makes you want to do the same, can we really classify Beautiful Agony as pornography? After all, it's only showing faces! What's so "indecent" about a face making all sorts of "interesting" expressions, and "funny" noises?

Maybe defining "pornography" would help. According to Merriam-Webster Online pornography is:

1 : the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement
2 : material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement

Hmmm, it does cause sexual excitement, and it does intend to do so. How do I know its intentions? Because the "About" section of Beautiful Agony specifically says - "This may be the most erotic thing you have ever seen, yet the only nudity it contains is from the neck up. That's where people are truly naked." So clearly the website knows that people are watching their material to become "sexually excited."

I suppose then that based on Merriam-Webster it is pornography. Wow. Just watching a face is pornographic. I never thought I'd hear that.

Still, I don't completely buy it. I can't bring myself to call it pornography. Of course it's extremely hot, but so are some billboards! Do they intend to cause sexual excitement? Yes! That's how they get people to purchase their products...But these types of ads aren't pornographic, just sexy. So for me, Beautiful Agony remains in that wickedly naughty area of amazingly-erotic but non-pornographic material.

After all, I can watch "regular" porn all day without even batting an eye, but Beautiful Agony makes *me* blush! Now that's saying something!

What do you think? Is it porn?! See for yourself. Then leave a comment and let me know!

To Orgasm or Not To Orgasm!

The first sexual experience with a new partner is always a tricky time. Unfailingly questions arise to make us feel nervous or jittery, usually helping to add to the excitement of the moment. Questions like; What will this mean? Should we do it right now? Will he/she be good in bed? Will I be good in bed? And while these are all concerns that most men and women share, there is one question in particular that seems to be specifically female oriented...Will I have an orgasm?!

For men, the answer almost goes without saying, "Yes I will." And if his orgasm could talk it would usually say something to the affect of, "This now concludes our sexual entertainment for this evening, thank you very much, and I hope you've enjoyed the ride!" However for women, even in today's world of Prime Time Orgasms, the answer to this question continues to be, "Probably Not!" In fact, according to an article recently published by CNN, 70% of all intercourse sessions end WITHOUT the woman experiencing the Big O at all! The reasons for not having an orgasm are numerous, a few being; the majority of women can not physically achieve orgasm based on penetration alone (regardless or what TV shows or Porn say!), in most cases it takes longer for her to climax, and it is generally acceptable for sex to end when he orgasms. Now, although these are all seemingly legitimate reasons for this contemptible lack of female gratification, my all time favorite reason behind this 70% figure is that apparently for many women the orgasm is not the goal, or even the best part, of the sexual experience. I just have one thing to say to these women...WHAT?! What women are they asking?! Have these women ever had an orgasm?! Have they been so brainwashed to believe that for women sex should be purely about emotional connection that they've given up fighting for their own rights to physical nirvana? Worse yet, I ask, exactly who made the rule that sex ends when he orgasms instead of me, and why would I ever acquiesce to this? I find it shocking that despite the fact that feminist have been arguing for women to take control of their own sexual pleasure for at least the past 30 years, as of today, 70% still have not listened. Now, before anyone goes a little crazy on me, I do agree there is more to sex than just having an orgasm. Of course the emotional connection is important, even if it is just a one-night romp, and of course the kissing, petting, yadda-yadda is wonderful in itself...but please don't try to convince me, that for some magical reason, women don't like experiencing orgasms just as much, if not more so (yes, the multiples!), than do men.

So, my big question today is...Women, do you orgasm during sex? Why or why not? Men, do you encourage your partner(s) to orgasm, or does sex end when you climax? (I do realize that this post mostly applies to heterosexual couples...)